Fly Lady

Keeping my house clean has always been a struggle. Laundry is the biggest factor. Now that Don is taking over laundry, I can focus on keeping the house clean. A couple of years ago I heard about Fly Lady. It is a website that teaches and encourages people to clean their house. I signed up for her e-mails a couple of years ago when we were in the other house. But I stopped the e-mails before we moved and never resigned up for the e-mails. I have been waiting till I knew I would actually do it.

What I like about Fly Lady is that she starts with the basics. She has me taking baby steps while building habits at the same time. The key, according to her, is to keep my sink clean. Every week there is a different part of the house that gets deep cleaned. Every morning and evening the house gets a once over. It is far easier than it sounds and it is perfect for people like me.

I jumped back on the wagon two weeks ago. So I am still getting the hang of everything. But I can say that my sink is clean. Even when I am exhaused, I try to clean up the kitchen before I go to bed. It is nice waking up to a clean kitchen.
I am what she calls a "flybaby". One day I hope to reach Jedi status and be able to "fly" on my own.

If you haven't heard of Fly Lady, you should really check out her site. It is www.flylady.net. It is free and can change your life.

Rejected by my own daughter

My little princess is breaking my heart. She decided that she is done breastfeeding, on my birthday no less. I have tried everything I could possibly think of to trick her back into breastfeeding again and she has determined that she is done. I am devastated.

I stopped breastfeeding Ky at one. I had heard that it was good to go a year if you could. But I missed my old body and thought that giving up breastfeeding would give it back to me. Boy was I wrong! My body will never be what it was before I had a baby. That is just mathematically impossible.

When Porter came along I had breast infection after breast infection. I could not wait to stop. But then he had RSV, high blood pressure and all those tests on his heart and kidneys and I realized that he needed to be breast fed as long as possible. I didn't stop till he was 22 months old. I went to Texas for a couple of days. I came home and fed him once in his sleep and that was it.

I didn't have half as many breast infections with Zander. I loved feeding him. He was never sick. But I still felt like I should feed him as long as I could. I don't remember when I stopped, but it was close to when he was two.

Now here is Dresden at 6 1/2 months saying she is done. She just up and stopped one day. I have absolutely no say in the matter. With Dresden being my last, I wanted to take my time feeding her. After all, she had RSV twice! I would have stopped around two.

Maybe I am learning what it is like to have a girl. Maybe this is just the beginning of her telling me how it is going to be and letting me know that she really is in charge. I am not sure if I am ready for this new pathway in life.

Bedtime Song

I love this!

Father's Day

Father's day was a little different from mother's day. I got up early. I fixed Don breakfast. I got all the kids ready for church. I even ended up keeping them out in the hall so Don could enjoy sacrament meeting. Of course, when we came home I took a three hour nap. So much for me being the good wife!
One of the things we gave Don for father's day was some car wax. Don was too busy on Monday, but you can guess exactly what he did on Tuesday...


The kids just had to help too. Don loves that car more than any of us will ever know.

Post Partum Depression

We have come a long way in the last nine years. I remember when I was pregnant with Kyath and I started to show signs of depression. I knew that I was suffering, but depression was a new thing for me. I remember asking for some medication while I was in my last trimester and it helped me through the last three months. After Ky was born, it hit even harder, I was still on the medication. I didn't, however, increase my dosage. Looking back, I think my dosage should have been increased.

I had a deep fear of hitting my baby's head on the doorway as I walked through doors. I believed that someone was going to kidnap my baby the minute I let go of the stroller when I went for walks. I had frequent suicidal thoughts. I remember asking new mothers if they were having the same experiences and feelings and everyone told me that I should probably get some professional help.

I knew I was crazy and that no one else understood. The last thing I wanted to tell anyone was that I was taking Prozac. Don knew and that was about it. I was embarrassed.

Nine years later (all nine on Prozac) I am going through post-partum again. This time I am happy to say that times have changed. I mentioned to a neighbor that I was struggling with post-partum depression and she didn't even flinch. She told me about the time she took Zoloft for a couple of months and urged me to call my doctor to see if I needed to change meds. I mentioned my struggle with my sister and she just comforted me and made me feel like everything would be okay. No one made me feel like the freaking monster I felt like nine years ago when I reached out for help.

I am glad to have girlfriends that love me and help me. I have the best support network and I love every one of them.

Olivia Tibbetts

Olivia was born Friday the 13th at 10:13. She was 6 lbs 4 oz and 19 inches long.
Both Jenny and the baby are good. Michael is a cute father. I am happy to be a part of Don's foster family.

Even Dresden was able to spend some quality time with Jenny.

Treat your mother right

I just went to see my mom for her birthday and my father for Father's day. I think Mr. T says it...

I saw this and I couldn't stop laughing

Porter-Man

My sweet neighbor brought over some flowers from her garden. I would tell you the name of them, but I always get it wrong. I even have one of these plants in my yard and love them. Anyways, she handed he a huge handful that she had just cut. I put them on the counter and went back out to talk to her for a little bit. When I came in, this is what Porter was doing...



He was arranging all the flowers in a vase. Then he took a few and put them on Lily's grave (Our pet Guinea pig). I thought it was so cute that he made sure that the flowers were in a vase with water. He is such a cute boy.



I am lucky to have such a creative, motivated child. He makes me smile everyday.

My little Porter

I have had a hard time with Kyath and Porter lately and so I have tried to change my tactics a little bit. I pretty much know what I need to do to help Kyath change, but I am not so sure with Porter. He has been yelling a lot and saying inapproprite things like, "Kill Barney." "Let's set Barney on fire." We have tried various things from time out to deprivation of Lucky Charms. Don actually kept him from church the other day because of something he said. We just don't feel like we are getting through to him.

I started to look at what he does to see where he learned it. Let's see...he yells. He yells... I yell. Hummm. Yeah, okay. So he learned how to yell from me. Not good. The things he says comes from all different stimuli around him. But I wondered what would happen if I went out of my way to treat Porter nicer.

I decided that I was going to try not to raise my voice at Porter. If he did something wrong, I would still talk to him about it, but I would not yell. I would watch what I said and make sure that I gave Porter plenty of attention. I didn't know what the end result would be, but I hoped it would help the situation.

Today is day two of the experiment. I have not yelled at Porter for two days. I have tried to give him extra attention

Why I hate Don

Sorry, I couldn't help myself. Like I would write a blog like this and post it on the web. Besides that, he is standing right here so I guess this blog isn't going to happen.

Why I love Don

Everyone has their Achilles heel. Anyone that knows me, knows that mine is laundry. I wash it, pull it out of the dryer and put it on the folding table. It stays on the folding table until someone needs to wear it. I try to fold laundry everyday. But I just don't ever get to the bottom of the laundry pile before I am washing again. I think having the fourth child did me in. I know I felt like laundry tripled with just having my first baby. Having the fourth just made laundry an impossible feat.

Don and I were downstairs talking the other night while I was folding laundry. I was telling him all the reasons I hated laundry. He said, "I finally see how much you hate laundry. I am going to take it over." I, of course answered with a, "Yeah, right!" I knew Don was just saying what I wanted to hear. There was no way he would take over folding the laundry. He didn't even know where to look for all the kids clothes. How could he put them away? He said, "No, I really am." I responded, "Yeah, I'll believe it when I see it."

Monday came, Don's day off and I tried not to get my hopes up. I really didn't want to think there was even a chance Don would fold a few clothes. I tried to keep myself busy with dishes and other household chores and not think about the laundry downstairs. I was edgy and Don could sense it. I tried not to be snappy as I waited to see if he would really even attempt to fold something, let alone put it away.

Don announced he was going downstairs to do laundry. Then, the miracle came. He did! He brought up load after load, folded them and put them away. He filled three bags for the DI. I watched in awe as he shrunk the folding table pile to almost nothing in a matter of time. I can't tell you how happy it made me.

I love Don because he sees what I can't do and does them. He knows what I am not and what I never will be and accepts that. He balances me out and makes me whole. Thanks Don. I love you.

Don's baby is back

Many of you are saying, "Don's baby? You mean Good Old Rusty is back?" No, no, no. Good Old Rusty is gone forever. Yeah! No, Don's other baby, the Ford Galaxie 500, has been fixed and is back home.

We bought the Galaxie back before Dresden was born. This was before Good Old Rusty came back and we were thinking, "Four kids, where are we going to fit them all when we drive around." We knew we couldn't afford a mini van. Don always wanted an old car. I figured we could drive it until we could afford something else. In the mean time, Don would have his dream car.

After Good Old Rusty died I started using the Galaxie to get around. It of course was not the vehicle I would have chosen, but it seats 6 and that is enough for our family. It at least looked better than the van I had used to parade the kids around town.

The Galaxie is a 1967 blue Ford. It has a 390 engine and a trunk big enough to hide at least two bodies. It still has the original AM radio and bench seats. There is no air conditioning, but there are wing windows that do let air in without having to open all the windows.

I think the first time I drove the Galaxie it broke down and I was stranded. I had flooded the carburetor. Don picked me up and went back to get the car hours later. It started right up for him. Don sent the carburetor to his brother and had him rebuild it. We also had the gas tank emptied and cleaned. We ended up replacing both mufflers and the distributor cap. Don assured me that the car would run as good as new and there wouldn't be anymore problems.

Yeah, he was wrong. We started to have car troubles again about the time we started to have van troubles. We were on the freeway when the passenger side back tire shredded off and left us stranded. We had a spare, but no lug nut wrench to take the tire off. Don hitchhiked with a nice man that took him to Wal-Mart to borrow the wrench. Don came back with the wrench, a bottle of water and a can of Dr. Pepper.

As cars flew past us, I worried that we would be hit from behind. I worried about Dresden and Zander as we sat in the hot car. I called the highway patrol and asked if they couldn't just park behind us for protection. By the time a highway patrolman came, I was a nervous wreak. Don had already taken off the tire and was about to put on the spare. I was glad to have the protection.

It didn't take long to realize that the spare was flat. A UDOT truck came and filled the tire with air. The tire still wouldn't hold the air. He told us to drive quickly. We drove off the freeway and went straight to Wal-Mart. They fixed the tire for free and sent us on our way.

We knew that the time had come to replace all four tires. We found the cheapest tires we could. We were set, at least I thought we were.

I was on my way back from running downtown when the car broke down again. The car just lost all power right when I was driving. I pulled over as much as I could before the Galaxie stopped completely. There I was on Beck Street blocking half of the lane. I tried unsuccessfully to find someone to help push the car off the road. My niece, Heather, came and brought me and the kids home. I was frustrated and I just couldn't think about the car.

It wasn't until Don called a couple of hours later that I told him what had happened. He left work right away to get his precious car. As we neared where we had stalled, I realized the car was gone. Don was terrified. He thought for sure someone had stolen his baby. He flagged down a Highway Patrolman who told us that the car had probably been impounded and to contact the Salt Lake City Police Department.

After jumping through several hoops, we picked the car up from the impound lot and brought it home. It, of course, started right up for Don! Don replaced the fuel pump and assured me that the car was as good as new and there would be no further problems.

Then, Don realized that there was still something wrong with the car. Maybe it had something to do with the time it stalled on him. It was his first time. So I guess that made it more necessary to take it in to a shop. We took it to Tunex to get minor adjustments made to get the car running again. As I picked up the car, the mechanic assured me that it was running great and I wouldn't break down anymore.

I hopped on the freeway to go home. The car stalled. I was livid! I started the car back up again and headed back to Tunex. It stalled three more times. I coasted into the parking lot and stomped in with my kids. The mechanic apologized profusely and said that there must be something wrong with the carburetor. Don's brother Dave rebuilt that carburetor and I just could not see how that could be the problem. But Don told them to open up the carburetor and see what the problem was.

Meanwhile, I was car less. I had baseball games and other events that I had to attend and no car. It was frustrating. I borrowed Debbie's car one day and drove Don to work another day. The rest of the time I just did without. It was hard. My dad lent us his truck this last week and that helped a lot.

The mechanic called and said that the carburetor was filled with rust. The gas tank needed to be replaced. It was a special order item that took a week to ship. What could we do? It is our only vehicle that fits the whole family. So we replaced the gas tank. The car was done yesterday. Don's baby is back. Don says that the car has finally reached its full potential and he can feel its power. I, on the other hand, am just waiting for the next breakdown.

Why am I so irritated today?

From the moment I woke up today I was grumpy, not the kind of grumpy that you let everyone know you are. I just turned every thought I had into a negative one (Maybe the car is actually fixed today- I can't wait to get it back so I can break down in the middle of nowhere with all the kids again. It's raining- I can't wait for the kids to track more mud all over the house! I wonder what Ky with throw a fit about today?) So I finally asked myself why I am just having such a battle with my thoughts today and I finally reflected on yesterday. Oh yeah, yesterday....

I woke up and cleaned all morning just to make Don feel bad. He had made a comment on Tuesday about the house being a mess after I had just spent two hours doing laundry. To top it off, I had just made him lunch! So yesterday I cleaned the bedrooms. In between cleaning I did more laundry. I swept all the floors and even had the children help vacuum and mop. I made sure I was too busy to make him anything to take to work to eat. I think he got the point.

After he left I still spent time trying to clean up so that when he came home he felt really bad.

I was looking forward to a night at my neighbor's house making homemade cards. I spent all day thinking about it in the back of my mind. With Don at work, I knew I would have find a babysitter for the kids. Lorinda told me I could bring the kids so I was set. I went over to her house and they had little kits all made up to make several different kinds of cards. I started making the first card and Kyath started up.

Kyath wined that he wanted to go downstairs with the two older boys. Lorinda had said that the baby was asleep downstairs and she wanted all the kids to stay upstairs. I told Ky "no" but he just kept pestering me about it. I told him that we were just going to go home and he decided he would stop pestering me. I started making the second card and he started wining again. On top of that Dresden was crying (Dresden doesn't cry that much so I guess I just wasn't expecting it.) I knew I was making the night unbearable for all the women that were there to chat and enjoy themselves.

I gathered up the family and went home. I sent Ky to his room as soon as we walked in the door. Then I told the kids to put a movie on and to give me time.

Some how Dresden didn't get the memo because she wouldn't stop crying. During the day I had lost her favorite binky and she just wouldn't settle for ANY of her other binkies. After an hour of her constant crying I decided it was time to buy her another binky. Zander was asleep and I really didn't want to wake him up. I knew if I told the boys I was going to the store they would insist on coming. I told them I was just going to drive around the neighborhood to get Dresden asleep. I drove as fast as I could to Smith's and bought a binky. I ripped the package open with my teeth and gave her it. There was no time to drive all the way home and get scissors. She needed the binky right then. She sucked on the binky and was a changed baby.

By the time Don came home Ky and Porter were still fighting going to sleep. Mind you, Don gets home at 10:30 at night. I had been trying to get them asleep since 8:30. I think they finally fell asleep at 11:00.

But today is a new day. I am trying to change my mood and change my thoughts.

ER Etiquette

Have you ever had to use the restroom at a public place and you are not sure if the restroom is occupied? What do you do to make sure that it isn't?

While I was at the ER for my most recent visit, I had need for use of the restroom. I knocked on the door and there was no reply. I opened the door half way in case there was someone in there, thinking they could yell out and I would close the door and wait till they were done. All I heard was a machine sound "psst...psst...psst".

The doctor walked by and I closed the bathroom door while I chatted about the next step for Zander's treatment. After our conversation I began the process again. I knocked on the door, no answer. I opened the door half way, "psst...psst...psst." I figured I was safe.

It wasn't until I opened the door fully that I realized that the bathroom was in fact occupied. There sitting on the toilet, looking me directly in the eyes was a Sudanese woman with her long robes that covered all the way to the ground. As our eyes locked I heard the machine sound once again coming directly from her mouth, "psst...psst...psst". I quickly closed the door.

So my question is...what is proper ER etiquette for making sure someone is not in the bathroom before you open the door?

Zander's Hospital Stay

On the day of family reunion, Zander woke up with a swollen eye. It almost looked like someone had hit him in the eye. I wondered if one of the boys had bumped him in the night or if a spider had bit him. I wasn't sure. But I thought, "Just my luck, we will go to reunion and everyone will think I hit my kid."

We kept an eye on him throughout the day. It wasn't until my mom said that it had really gotten worse that I started to worry. Don and I decided that we better leave family reunion early and take him in to get it checked. With it being Memorial Day, I knew a lot of the clinics would be closed. So we just went straight to Primary Children's Hospital.


By the time we arrived, his eye was pretty much swollen shut. They put in an IV so they could give him antibiotics as soon as possible. I was so glad Don was there. I usually go alone with the injured child while Don stays with the rest. But he was there to help hold him down. It was traumatic for all of us.

They started talking about a CAT scan to make sure that the infection hadn't spread to the back of the eye. I looked at the doctor and asked if she was kidding. How could something that started so little grow into something so serious, so fast? Don held him down yet again, this time for the CAT scan. But he was inconsolable and started crying out for me. I went in while Don stayed out with Dresden. I sang every song I could think of to try to keep him still. We blew bubbles, played with balls. They had someone there that brought all these toys in hopes to keep him still long enough to do the CAT scan. Finally they realized that it was pointless. They sedated Zander and were able to do the CAT scan.


As we sat waiting for the results, I was trying to keep Zander busy. I let him hold the camera and take a couple of pictures. I like this picture. This was the nurse that was telling us that the infection didn't spread and that it was time to start the antibiotics.

The doctor came in an started talking about having us stay the night. I was still in denial surprised that such a little thing could turn into something so scary. We ended up staying overnight and going home late in the afternoon on Tuesday. By the time we went home he had had four doses of IV antibiotics. His eye had just started opening again. They told us that he had Cellulitis resulting from a bug bite that was infected.

Zander is doing great now. His eye isn't swollen anymore and looks perfectly normal (Well, except for the bruise from running into a drawer on Friday, but that is another story!).