Why am I so irritated today?

From the moment I woke up today I was grumpy, not the kind of grumpy that you let everyone know you are. I just turned every thought I had into a negative one (Maybe the car is actually fixed today- I can't wait to get it back so I can break down in the middle of nowhere with all the kids again. It's raining- I can't wait for the kids to track more mud all over the house! I wonder what Ky with throw a fit about today?) So I finally asked myself why I am just having such a battle with my thoughts today and I finally reflected on yesterday. Oh yeah, yesterday....

I woke up and cleaned all morning just to make Don feel bad. He had made a comment on Tuesday about the house being a mess after I had just spent two hours doing laundry. To top it off, I had just made him lunch! So yesterday I cleaned the bedrooms. In between cleaning I did more laundry. I swept all the floors and even had the children help vacuum and mop. I made sure I was too busy to make him anything to take to work to eat. I think he got the point.

After he left I still spent time trying to clean up so that when he came home he felt really bad.

I was looking forward to a night at my neighbor's house making homemade cards. I spent all day thinking about it in the back of my mind. With Don at work, I knew I would have find a babysitter for the kids. Lorinda told me I could bring the kids so I was set. I went over to her house and they had little kits all made up to make several different kinds of cards. I started making the first card and Kyath started up.

Kyath wined that he wanted to go downstairs with the two older boys. Lorinda had said that the baby was asleep downstairs and she wanted all the kids to stay upstairs. I told Ky "no" but he just kept pestering me about it. I told him that we were just going to go home and he decided he would stop pestering me. I started making the second card and he started wining again. On top of that Dresden was crying (Dresden doesn't cry that much so I guess I just wasn't expecting it.) I knew I was making the night unbearable for all the women that were there to chat and enjoy themselves.

I gathered up the family and went home. I sent Ky to his room as soon as we walked in the door. Then I told the kids to put a movie on and to give me time.

Some how Dresden didn't get the memo because she wouldn't stop crying. During the day I had lost her favorite binky and she just wouldn't settle for ANY of her other binkies. After an hour of her constant crying I decided it was time to buy her another binky. Zander was asleep and I really didn't want to wake him up. I knew if I told the boys I was going to the store they would insist on coming. I told them I was just going to drive around the neighborhood to get Dresden asleep. I drove as fast as I could to Smith's and bought a binky. I ripped the package open with my teeth and gave her it. There was no time to drive all the way home and get scissors. She needed the binky right then. She sucked on the binky and was a changed baby.

By the time Don came home Ky and Porter were still fighting going to sleep. Mind you, Don gets home at 10:30 at night. I had been trying to get them asleep since 8:30. I think they finally fell asleep at 11:00.

But today is a new day. I am trying to change my mood and change my thoughts.